One: Yeah---It's time for the annual Tug, Tug-O-War!
Two: Yes! It is Tug, Tug-O-War time!
Judge: To your places, tuggers.
One: Hold up! O Great Tug Awareness!
Two: Yeah, before we get roped into this. What is this Tug-O-War thing anyway?
Judge: HA---HAAAAAA! You're serious aren't you? Okay, Webster defines Tug-O-War as a contest in which two teams pull at opposite ends of a rope, each trying to drag the other across a central line.
One and Two: Okay, Ready, 1, 2, 3 (Both pull against themselves - the wrong way)